Natalie the boy’s mother does not give up: I want a girl


Photo: Getty Images

She already has everything for her little girl, but at the moment, Natalie (31 years old) has to make do with four sons. If she cannot have a daughter with her boyfriend, she is even considered a benefactor to make her wish come true.

“I have always loved caring for others. I think I inherited that from my father. He worked at the zoo. Love of animals, for others, for children: I obviously inherited that from him. He is now deceased, and my mother and sisters have much less motivation.”

This care has been around from an early age. I’ve had several babysitting titles where I’ve taken care of kids for years. When my first nephew was born, I thought he was awesome. I loved taking it with me on the road and was always busy with it.

I was raised in the home of a real girl: my mother has four daughters. I have two older sisters and one younger one. I think part of my desire for girls definitely stems from the family I grew up in myself. My sisters have boys and girls, while I’m the only one who has boys.

Full house

You could say I have a full house. I am a mother of four sons. Harry is thirteen years old, Peter XI. They have the same father. Then I have a nine-year-old son, Jean, from the second father, and a five-year-old son, a sack from the third father. We also have many animals in the house: four parrots and eight cats. I also have a friend, with whom I do not live, who has two children: a 10-year-old son and a seven-year-old daughter. So we have a mixed family of six kids. We also really want a baby together.

“We sometimes have big fights over these kinds of things.”

There is only one problem: our relationship is a bit strained at the moment. It could just be that things are going well between us. My friend is controlling, strict and closed, while I am very free and open. I love the people around me, and I have a lot of friends, but I don’t know if I could keep seeing them all if we moved in together. I’m on Facebook and TikTok, and it doesn’t support that either. I just want to keep doing my things, preferably with him and one of our children. But we get into big fights over these things now and then.

It’s hard because I love it and I want to achieve it. Everyone says I should go on alone, but it’s hard when you love someone. My wish, my dream to have a girl with him, is very powerful.

Read also – Choosing embryos for a girl: “I wanted a daughter so badly”>

heavy load

Now I’m first looking to see if I can have another baby with my boyfriend, but if that’s not possible for whatever reason, I really want to do it on my own. After my last birth, when I was 27, I said, “I want to be sterilized now.” Pregnancy was tough, I’m past 40 weeks, and I kept walking around with that belly. I’ve never had that before. I gave birth in three seconds, things went really fast and my son almost died in childbirth.

It was very painful. But despite the difficulty of childbirth, they did not want to sterilize me. They don’t do that before you’re thirty. In addition, they thought I should think about it carefully and not make a hasty decision. I was firmly convinced that I did not want any more children; I’m done with that. But after a few months I noticed: I still want a baby, I want a girl! I haven’t lost that feeling since then.

“A few months later I noticed: I still want a baby, I want a girl!”

Because I know how hard it is to have kids, I don’t want to wait that long. Although I am only 31 years old, I am of course also getting older. And the older you get, the more likely it will get worse. Due to time pressure, if it doesn’t work out for my current boyfriend, I want to start looking for a donor from next year, via the official route. It’s such a deep, deep desire to have another girl that I just can’t get the idea out of my head.

Donor Path

A friend of mine has three children from a benefactor, she is single and a lesbian. Another friend has just completed the whole process, her baby is now eleven months. Thanks to them I now know what options and which doors to knock on. There are friends who would like to help me with that, haha! But I don’t want it that way. I’d rather not have a child than someone I know. However, it’s nice to know that I have alternatives, if my current boyfriend doesn’t quite work out.

Not only will I enter this donation process because I am getting older and the medical risks are increasing, but also because I enjoy being a young mother. I’ve already noticed that a sleepless night really has a negative effect. Recently, one of my sons was sick one night and the next day I was devastated. I also resolved that if I succeeded, I would handle it very easily. Now I’m busy all day, but then I’ll rest. Give me a baby and I’ll sit on the couch with him all day long. Then you also relax in a different way.

Totten

Now I can sometimes cuddle with my children. Apply creams to the hair. But more often they begin to suffer: “Mom, behave normally.” They no longer care. Fortunately, I can still go with my daughter. Putting make-up together and braiding her hair. Or we both wear the same dress.

“I tried to think: How important is this Getut?”

She loves him, and I just love him so much. This shit, I love it. I definitely tried to get past that, thinking: How important is this? But as soon as I see it, I start over: “Isn’t it?” Then grab the nail polish and we’re happy.

mom boy

All my friends have girls. I love that. At first I thought: I am really a born mother, but this desire, this dream of having another girl, still remains. In the attic beds, buggy, pink girls’ clothes. I have already bought everything for my daughter and got a lot of pink clothes from others because they know this is my dream. He is right in it.

“If the fifth child is a boy again, it makes no difference”

How is the fifth child a girl? If he was a boy again, it wouldn’t be any different. Then I have to accept that I was born my mother. With five kids, that’s really enough, six kids is a lot to me.

The eldest of them is now really a teenager and has nothing to do with children, but my other boys love him so much that I still wish she was a girl. One of my sons said when we were hugging a friend’s baby, “Mom, I want a sister too.” I think it’s nice to hear that. Sometimes they say girls are harder than boys, and when I look at my girlfriends, I think: Yes, it is. My children are very easy. But the boys are completely different, they play differently. They are real mourners.

Read also – Meryl had another boy after 3 boys: “I cried on ultrasound”>

girl

Everyone around me knows I want another girl. Also because I say it a lot. Then I hug someone else’s baby girl and say: “I want another daughter” or see a picture of a baby on Facebook, then write: “Now my girl.” One says, “Huh? You already have four,” and the other: “Yeah, cute.” My friends, whether they have a baby or four, can sigh: “I’m done with it, I don’t need it anymore,” while I just think: Hey Another baby, cute!

“There are also people who think my footprint is big enough.”

Of course there are also people who like it. Who thinks my imprint is big enough, or who doesn’t understand that I want another child. Who have a fourth already said, “Geez, another one?” But yes, I think: whether there are four or five, it no longer matters? What if this happened to be my dream? I think I should follow my dream.

whole life

Napping together, shopping together: I can really see it. Go out a bit, go out with my daughter. My sons play games and I hope I can do more with my daughter than with these guys. These images go through my head, and I can’t really get them out that way.

At the moment I am getting benefits, but I really want to get an education. Something in healthcare seems interesting to me. I think I’d be really good for that too. At first I thought: maybe I should do something with the kids, but I came back from this idea. Then you will be among your children during the day, and between your children in the evening. That might be too much. But something with hospice care or something, seems to me to be a thing. And that girl over there, that really completes my life.”

For privacy reasons, the names of Natalie and her sons have been changed. This article appears on Kek Mama 10-2022.

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