Do you yearn for a relationship? Three Biblical Attributes of a Good Man

Each couple (married) has a beginning. I met one day and decided to start a relationship together. You probably knew right away that it was the person. I’m not quick at it,–he only came with me later–but I knew I’d met someone special. He’s not perfect, he’s not perfect, but he’s such a good guy and I’m so thankful that we belong together! My sister and I talked a lot about men and relationships a while ago. She was at the beginning of a relationship and she asked me: What is a good man and how do I know that I am choosing the right man? Of course you don’t know for sure, but we can look at what the Bible says about relationships and men, and based on that we can make our choices while praying.

Text: Doreen

First, I would say that relationships are very beautiful, but also very difficult. There is no such thing as the perfect man or the perfect woman. My husband and I have been married for 13 years, we’ve been through a lot of ups and downs, and we’ll likely have a lot. Every relationship is different because everyone is different, and some couples will have to fight harder for a good relationship than others. There is no coordination for the perfect man or woman and certainly not for the perfect relationship. However, we can look at what the Bible says and look for a good basis for the relationship. How should you position yourself in a relationship, what is a good base position and what are the good qualities of a potential future partner?

What does the Bible say about relationships?

In Song of Songs we all find beautiful words about the relationship between a man and a woman. It is very useful to read it once. There you will find a beautiful pure passion for each other. Let us now turn to another Bible book to read some well-known texts on marriage.

And be humble to one another out of awe of God. O women, serve your husbands with humility and love, as you serve the Lord. Because the husband is the head of his wife, just as Christ is the head of his church. He takes care of his body. Just as the church serves Christ in all things, so the wife must serve her husband in all things.

Husbands, love your wives in the same way that Christ loves his church. He sacrificed himself for the Church! … in the same way every man should love his wife. He must love her as much as he loves himself. After all, man and woman become one. A man who loves his wife loves himself. Nobody hates his body. Everyone takes care of her and feeds her. Christ does the same with his congregation. We are the members of his body. It was written in the books that a man and his wife are one: “Therefore a man will turn away from his father and mother, and love his wife and be faithful to her. From that moment on, they are all one.” This has a hidden meaning. I tell you this has to do with the unity of Christ and His Church. So men should love their wives as much as they love themselves, and wives should respect their husbands.
(Ephesians 5:22-33)

This article is specifically about married couples, but if we get to the heart of the matter, we see that this can also apply to initiating relationships. Here Paul lays an important foundation for the relationship. We can use this foundation as a guideline when we are at the beginning of a relationship. We can even make a small list of characteristics from these verses to determine their type ‘Good’ man to describe:

  1. He must be in awe of God
  2. He must love himself
  3. He should be able to love his partner

Good qualities of a man

The above three points can be taken from Paul’s words. We’ll dig into it a bit more:

  1. He must be in the fear of God.

If you are looking for a partner who believes in God, if he assumes that God is the creator of heaven and earth, that everything originated from him and everything in him has a purpose (Romans 11:36), then you build the same. Stone. You share the most important thing in your life together.

  1. He must love himself;

This does not mean that he should not be insecure on himself, then it will be impossible to find a partner! This means, I think, that he takes care of himself and takes responsibility for himself.

  1. He must be able to love his partner.

It’s not just love, it’s sacrificial love that Paul describes here. A love like Christ sacrificed himself for the Church.

At the beginning of a relationship, this is a love that you can hardly distinguish. Love must grow. You can recognize this type of love by the priorities that the other person sets: is he vulnerable, can he share, does he let you into his life, is he interested in your thoughts and feelings?

Good qualities of a woman

What we often need to realize in relationships is that a relationship is made up of two people: him and you. Paul wrote with women that we should be humble, loving, and respectful of our partner. Beware of this! We often want to change our partner, make him the perfect and ideal man we dreamed of before we even spoke, but beware! Be humble and loving in this. Respect who he is in that moment, and learn to accept the person in front of you for who they are. This is the ministry Paul writes about.

for work!
Do you yearn for a love relationship?

We read in Ephesus that marriage has a hidden meaning. It speaks of the unity of Christ and the Church. The desire you have in a relationship is the same as Christ’s desire for his church. Tell him your desire, he understands you!


I want to thank you for the sacrificial love you have for your church. I want to thank you and praise you for loving me so much. You who are so great and full of love and full of longing for your Church Bride.

You also know my longing and my longing for Shrek. To a person as described in Ephesians, to one who loves you, loves himself, and loves me. Will you lead me to this partner?

Until then (and then of course) you will be the center of my desire. You who have so much love, you who give so much love. I will fulfill my wish.


Doreen’s Meditation previously appeared on, a platform for young Christian women in which a short biblical meditation is published every day.

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