“Instead of clutter, kids give me more organization”


Photo: Mark Groenefeld

Hyacinth, entrepreneur Josh Feldhuizen put all of her time and energy into her first child: her company. But then another baby came, and another. “I knew: This has to change, because I also want to be a good mother.”

She is in fashion of late. “How could it be otherwise for a fashion girl?” Josh laughs. As long as you remember it was “just late”. She likes to surround herself with people who have things in order. However, I have noticed little improvement in this area in recent years. People say having kids often makes more chaos, but the opposite happens to me: kids give me more organization.

change of plans

Even before the birth of her daughter Alexis, Josh decided to radically change her schedule. She remembers that moment well four years ago. “Nick and I really wanted the kids, but…not yet. And suddenly it turned out I was pregnant! I had just sent the CFO and CEO away, and we were in the midst of a move and remaking business and private, so I felt the worst timing ever of being pregnant.”

Josh says, it turns out he actually checked because it’s surprising change of plans It forced her to look at her work differently.

“I knew right away that I also wanted to be a good mother, and so I had to organize my work life in a different way. I could no longer be the articulate manager who liked me to be among her colleagues – really, I didn’t attend all the birthday parties at the time – but in this Meantime I had about fifty people working for me. I was working day and night, traveling from here to there. I decided to be a management team, and since then I have scheduled fewer appointments per day and give myself more space than before. It is the best decision ever, though From time to time I miss classmates. Anyway, again: I also want to be a good mother, so you have to choose.”

first child

Her fashion company, which has been around for 11 years and expanded with JOSH V Home last year, is Josh’s first child—the one who deserves all the attention. “Even a week before Alexis was born, I was still running around in high heels and thinking: As soon as I feel good, I’ll take the baby to the office, and she can play in the nursery while I work. This expectation is meaningless. It was absolutely not possible.” But you won’t know until you test it.”

‘Even a week before giving birth, I was still running in high heels’

Plus, due to complications, the birth was very different from what was expected – Josh had heavy flows and lost so much blood that she ended up on the operating table after giving birth. “I wasn’t nearly there,” she says, touched. “Especially for Nick it was horrible; during the 45 minutes I was on the operating table, Alexis in his arms, he didn’t know if I was going to do it.” Fortunately things went well. “I couldn’t help myself, I was unconscious. So when I later heard what happened, it sounded like it was about someone else. I was terribly tired, but I couldn’t remember much about it.”

Read also – “Maternity visits prohibited in the first two weeks after delivery”

Recheck

In the end, Josh had to rehab for six months to make up for the lost blood on his own. “I couldn’t walk or speak in full sentences, couldn’t do anything, I was so bad after this flow. In the meantime, my team continued my work, for which I am still very grateful. But I had no choice, I couldn’t go to Which, by the way, enabled me to spend a lot more time with Alexis in those early months, presumably more than what would have been “normal.”

Together with Nick, the painful birth gave a place. “We didn’t need follow-up conversations with the hospital or a psychiatrist, we wanted to move on with our lives.”

The shock didn’t start until after Josh got pregnant with Elodi last year. “I suddenly noticed how nervous I was and how exciting Nick found everything. I had serious panic attacks. Fortunately, we received good instructions from the hospital and the birth was so tightly planned that we didn’t experience any surprises. It reassured me.

“I didn’t realize until after Elodi was born how bad I was with Alexis”

In the end, I was more than willing to deliver than the first time. Thanks to all that help, Elodi’s birth became a fairytale one. After that I was also very fit – which made me realize even more how bad I was with Alexis. The extra long vacation we had planned worked for me too. At home with Elodi and Alexis, it was such a great pleasure.”

Josh Feldhuyzen interview with Nir

The system you dreamed of

The fun is also about Elodi’s laid-back nature – a world different from her always fun and active sister, Josh laughs. “The contrast between the two was palpable in my stomach: Alexis was so strong and powerful that she kicked my ribs, and Elodie felt like a butterfly fluttering in my stomach.

“Elodi was like a butterfly fluttering through my stomach”

There is also a difference in everyday life: Alexis is the sunshine in the house, you can’t ignore her, Elodie is so calm that sometimes you almost forget she’s there! In that regard, this is the perfect arrangement,” Josh laughs. “Elodi is a wonderful, sweet addition to our blended family.”

Josh Feldhuyzen interview with Nir

composite family

Because every other weekend, Nino (15) and Lewin (13), Nick’s kids from a previous relationship also join the family in Lareen. When Josh met Nick eight years ago, she knew he already had kids and was out of a long relationship. That’s why I immediately asked during one of their first dates if he still wanted to get married and have children. “I’m too busy with work to waste my time on men who aren’t serious: I should have known.”

Fortunately, Nick turned out to be more than serious and allowed him to move on to the next round quickly, Josh winks. “Six months later we bought a house together and three years later I was pregnant with Alexis. The pace was good.”

The fact that Nick actually had two kids older than him didn’t deter Josh. exactly the contrary. Many people said: Where do you start? But I found the fact that Nick was a really serious, fun dad attractive. In addition, I love children and I dreamed of a large family. I would never have dreamed that at the age of thirty-five I would have a family with four children; I really consider Nino and Lewin a huge bonus.”

The entire interview is on Kek Mama 08-2022.

Josh Feldhuyzen interview with Nir

Would you like to read more beautiful and recognizable stories from other mothers? Subscribe now and get Kek Mama first at your doorstep every month.

Leave a Comment