Women are not made for their own work

A woman can be seen as a neck on which the head – the male partner – can lean as he climbs the career ladder. Then the woman forms the safety net by taking care of the children and the family. Why do you want to mess with this formula?

I was shocked when my teacher gave this answer after asking why there are so few women in the job at age 17. As absurd as it may sound above, in only 10 percent of heterosexual couples the division of labor is paid and caring Unpaid children balanced.

I don’t see a problem that some people prefer dividing the roles above according to their status. Despite this, this image of young people is presented as ideal.

Work on one, family on two

As shown in my first column, organizations are based on a men model† Because organizations were founded by men, men are the norm. Women try in vain to fit into a mold designed for the man.

this is men model It becomes noticeable when we look at the combination of (higher) job and motherhood. The fact that women have children in addition to their jobs shows that women do not live to work. Organizations seem to prefer the person who appears to be doing it: the childless man or woman.

As a woman approaches the age of thirty, expectations about motherhood emerge

There is an understanding of family care, but it is difficult. We expect men to put work first and for the care of the children to fall on the partner’s shoulders. For example, suppose the mother comes out of work early to pick up a sick child from the nursery and not the father.

As a woman approaches the age of thirty, expectations surrounding motherhood emerge. Many organizations are reluctant to hire or promote such a woman. She is expected to have children and the organization will be affected by this. This “burden” consists of absences during maternity leave and the expected shift in priority from work to the child.

Free parental leave and child care

So expanding paid parental leave to fathers this year appears to be a step in the right direction. This leads to positive things such as a stronger bond between father and child, a more equal distribution of care responsibilities and less negative business consequences for women.

If caring responsibilities are divided equally between men and women from the start, this will be more effective in the long run than trying to straighten out the relationship if it starts skewed. Now only the threshold to take this leave as a father.

Read alsoWhat does long-term partner leave mean? Two parents say

Contrary to social expectations, women continued to work full time after having their children. There is often some misunderstanding within organizations, but there is also real interest. How are you going to do that, that group? A question that is rarely asked of a father.

The announcement that childcare will be 95 percent free for working parents by 2025 is also positive. The current high prices send an implicit signal that it would not be right to take advantage (too much) of these, so that women often stay at home to look after them. So adjusting this is critical.

Always available to work

Women who have children feel they have to make an extra effort to compensate. The fact that childless women or men seem to have an advantage within organizations encourages attendance: the feeling of constantly needing to be there for work to show you’re nowhere near a corner.

A prominent woman explains how she was not able to attend a work event and was then told how to talk about it. Phrases like “Yeah, but she’s a mom, right? And then you get that after-hours came into her ears. They forgot to check that she had dinner that evening with an important client who had been scheduled for quite some time.”

I think a child benefits more from happy parents

The social expectations generated by cash are not limited to business. Far from it, superior women are called bad mothers or happen to have their child addressed in the schoolyard about their mother’s absence. The expectations that precede this type of behavior are deeply rooted in our society. We hardly know anything better.

From an early age, we are presented with a somewhat traditional image of the Netherlands, with a different treatment of father and mother. While there is no scientific evidence that women take better care of their children than men.

I think a child benefits more from happy parents. If it means (also) that a woman wants to lose her ambition in a full-time job, so be it.

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