Lisbeth a foster mother: ‘He was a part of her from the first moment’ | Stories behind the news

“My husband and I started foster care a year after the birth of our 7-year-old daughter, Charlotte. In those six years we took care of about 15 children. We have chosen short-term care, so that we can help the children as best as possible during the time of crisis.

The child will then remain for as long as necessary. Until it becomes clear where he will grow up. In practice, this means that we can be called at 1:30 pm and two hours later there is a baby carriage at our door. We are now hosting two children whose names must remain anonymous for their privacy and security.

adopted child

Our adopted son (3 years) came to us when he was just an infant. Around his first birthday, we signaled to Youth Care that he can continue to grow with us if needed. He is usually moved to a “perspective” nursing home.

The match between him and our family was good, he was a part of it from the first moment. Therefore, he will continue to live with us until he becomes an adult. We have been taking care of a baby for six months now. I am not his mother and Jasper is not his father. I think it is important to know who his biological parents are. He calls me “Mama,” but that’s because everyone in this house calls me “Mama.”

Children

When a baby leaves, I miss him sometimes. I am still in contact with an adoptive mother, because we took care of her baby immediately after he was born. Her baby lived with us for three months. I still keep in touch with my grandmother who once took care of her granddaughter. She is now 2.5 years old.

I like to hear from time to time how the kids are doing. Our children are very resilient and things are going well every time our family composition changes again. Of course, one child may be more understanding of the situation than another, but this also has to do with age.

We currently take care of children from 0 to 6 years old. This is a conscious choice to avoid potential conflicts. We already have four teenagers of different ages in our house. In the future I would like to go to the teenagers.

for work

In addition to taking care of adopted children, I work 8 hours a week in my parents’ library. I maintain the site and social media. I do this from home. Jasper is self-employed and has an ingenious company. He currently works abroad from Monday to Thursday every week. He builds car spray booths there.

On Fridays it is free, then we often drink coffee all morning with a delicious cake or go somewhere for lunch or for a walk with the dog. Can’t have a nice conversation during the week, because we are both very busy. So we’re enjoying the extra weekend.

Income

Jasper brings in the most money. From my salary we can buy groceries for two weeks and then it ends. We have had a joint account since the beginning of our relationship. Nothing is separate with us. I don’t see the point of it.

Everything is fine between us, so I expect different bills will never be necessary. I am convinced that we will always be together. So I don’t have to be independent of Jasper either. We do not receive any income for the reception of adopted children, but we receive a certain compensation. This is enough to support children. So we spend this on clothes, food and drink for our adopted children.

House keeping

Housekeeping mostly comes to me. For a few years now, the cleaner comes every two weeks. I wanted extra help, because my hands are full of children. Fortunately, my daughters also help out a lot at home. For example, we all do the laundry together.

I fold it away ASAP, but my daughters also regularly sit on the sofa with a laundry basket. I grew up in a large family and am used to sharing everyone from home. This is what I expect from my children. Young children do not have to help the family. And because we take in young adopted children, they obviously don’t have to help either.

takes care

Jasper is far from home a lot, but when he is at home, he also helps with family affairs. I often have to slow it down a bit, because it’s busy. On weekends he usually puts young children to bed, because he is away on other evenings. He also picks up the vacuum cleaner alone regularly and does some laundry on the weekends.

Taking care of the children is very much my responsibility. My daily tasks vary greatly. I have a baby, a toddler, a teether (a teether between a teen and a toddler), one teen and three teens. This means that you feel anxious from early morning until late at night. I make bottles and change nappies, but I also have to help out with the teen’s homework. This ensures that I am always busy.

However, I think it is important to make time for each other. So Jasper and I still plan fun activities together. For example, we like to go for a walk with the dog or have a nice lunch together. Before you know it, you haven’t spoken to each other in weeks and you both snore next to each other in bed. You should try to avoid it. This is why our goal is to go away for at least 2 nights 3-4 times a year.”

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